God Whispers

In the world of being a parent, there are days when life gets crazy- everything seems to go wrong... all the balls that you are trying to juggle fall one by one... and you are left to wonder if you are in fact raising the kids that you envisioned on the day you became their parent.  I remember exactly how I felt after seeing each of their faces for the first time.  I remember how much I loved them in that first second and how I thought that each of their lives were going to filled with fun times and perfect moments.  Fast forward several years and those voices that used to "coo" at me can now have a bit of a sassy tone to them... those eyes that used to light up when I walked into the room can now roll at things I say... and those tears that used to fall when I left them behind can now fall from being grounded.  And some days I am left to wonder if I am in fact making the difference I thought I would.  I have learned first hand that being a parent is hard work!  It is a truly a gift from God... and I know I am doing the best job that I can...but there are days when I simply wonder if God made some mistake in thinking that I could handle it all.

But then there are moments that I like to think of as "God Whispering" moments.  They are moments when I truly feel that God is speaking to me and telling me that I am doing a good job as a Mom.  Times when He is showing me that I am raising great, kind-hearted kids!  They are moments that help me overlook the sassy tones and the eye rolls, and make me clearly see the "bigger picture". They can happen at any second of the day and they come without notice.  They show up in the car rider line when they yell that they love me and to "have a great day, Mom"...at times when one may get hurt and I see how they take care of each other...at the ball field and I hear Parker tell his teammates that they were "born to hit that ball" and "we win as a team and lose as a team"... and during bedtime prayers when I hear the most precious things they are thankful for.  They are some of my most favorite moments!  I feel they are like a little "happy" from God... a little gift from above to help refuel this mommy's soul!

This was definitely one of those moments!  Recently I wrote about sweet little Lucy Krull.  She is a precious 5 year old girl in the biggest fight of her life battling Medulloblastoma.  She is very well known around our house.  Not only do we say many prayers for her... she also comes up in basic conversation.  When Lily scraped her arm the other day, Parker said "Lily, did you know that Lucy didn't even cry when she was going to surgery... I know you can handle a small boo-boo".  Anyhow, she is definitely on all of our minds.  Well, last night, Ava asked if she could write a letter to Lucy on our chalkboard.  In the past, I've taken pictures of things they've written on the board and Ava asked if I would take a picture and send it to Lucy.  When I asked her what she wanted to write... this is what she came up with:

She did ask for help with spelling and wanted me to retrace some of her words to make them darker (and of course Lily wanted to add a few letters as well)... but this message came straight from Ava's heart to a little girl she hasn't even met yet.  I could not have been more proud.. for in that second, I knew that Ava got it!  I realized that she truly understands that with God, ALL things are possible and we should always have faith in Him!  And what made it an even better memory is that when Ava said it, she said it in such a "matter of fact" tone.  Like there is no reason to wonder... and no question to ask.  "Don't worry Lucy... God is healing you!"  It was definitely a "God Whispering" moment and I was so proud! 

In all the craziness of life- all the moments when I question my sanity...all the hairs that are turning gray from stress and worry... all the moments I wish I could redo over again- I know I wouldn't trade any of it!  I know I was given a true gift from above when God thought enough of me to be their Mommy.  And on the days when I wonder if I am doing a good job,  I will listen to those "God Whispering" moments.  They can happen at any second and show up without notice... but they are ALWAYS welcome in this Mommy's day!